Thank you Rose City Book Pub <3
So today I did a thing not only did I never think I would do, but also would never have believed I did it. I read poetry out loud, and like… it was MY poetry. Not someone else’s and…. and I did it. I felt like Mocha Chino!!!! I never thought I’d be in a room, reading poetry, and then getting like, positive reinforcement afterwards???? It was WIIIIIILD. I read ‘A Reflection of Me’ ‘Just Hanging’ then I finished my set with ‘The Crown Shaped to my Head’. just because there’s a theme and connection with those. I might do this again? I might go to other places and read as well? IDK yet, but holy fuck the anxiety and nerves I had lmaoooo. Never did I have these playing Von Trap, or Bottom, or ANY narrator-y role I got pigeonholed into. But fuck, yeah, I just openly admitted some shit and, probably for the first time (sober) ((and not with an abuser)) I actually showed parts of my soul and who I am…. that’s probably why the fear and anxiety was so strong. I won’t even lie, I smoked like 1/4th a cig afterwards with someone (maybe new friend) else who was reading. They also drew me while I read and I swear to GOD IDK if anyone has ever just… randomly drawn me, then gave it to me, especially a stranger, but still. It was a good day, and I apologize for the long radio silence. I’ve been working the QRC for the last week, and I had to go to the ER and Dentists just to be told I need 3 root canals (the thembo whose somehow never had a cavity now needs root canals, wildin)…. Birthday was scary and not great… uhhhhh…. OH I HAVE been struggling a lot with some depression and memories lately, and deffinitly been feeling more isolated then in solitute, but hopefully soon I’ll be in a safe house wher eI don’t have to be in CONSTANT fear and actually feel normal again. Hopefully.
Oh And keep an eye out, I might make another Page specificlly for my Poems, I’ll keep the ones here for now, but yeah. Just becaus eI have a handful of poems I’ve written and I wanna put them somewhere, and they aren’t exactly a today journal or whatever, sooooo idk. Anyways, Love ya, and catch you soon!!!
(Oh also, got 3 A’s and a B for my first term!!!! And I finished my animatic!!! I’ll post that too)
- Love Goblynx Joestar UwU
