Nonbinary Transfemme

So honestly the fact that it’s not always easy to just exist and be perceived, especially in early transition, makes doing anything in life nearly impossible.  I don’t know if it’s just clothes, or if it’s surgery, or if it’s something monetary that can immediately “cure” these horrible feelings when it comes to being misgendered, mistreated, or hated against.  And then there’s the internal struggles that stop us from wanting to try, or reach out and be like “Hey professor, you know those times you and the class misgendered me has been making me feel not great” WHICH HEY, HAI, HELLO BESTIE, that ISN’T EASY!  Like, so many cis people just can not understand the just level of strength it requires sometimes to be, especially in front of a class they’ve never been in, or to an individual who may cause triggers or traumas and say stuff like this.  So then, as a student we got to decide, okay how much debt is this gonna put us.  Scholarships and grants and loans and etc aren’t always guaranteed, and if THAT’S’ the case, then what’s the priority….. And like, that’s the struggle right, with finances and being trans in general, but where is the priority suppose to be.  Mental health stops us from killing our selves (YAY!!!!) not being in a society that accepts us and makes it easy to get said mental health (booooooo) ….. I I originally dropped out of college after nearly finishing because I was in the closet and my mental health had spiraled so bad I couldn’t breath pretty much.  Some schools like PCC has a pretty easy system atleast with changing your preferred name and gender markers in their entire system, and also has some amazing queer resource centers.  These places are safe havens and sanctuaries, but are only a momentary bliss when there’s still so many personal expenses you can’t figure out because your educational ones are coming first….

My stream of counsciosness essentially unedited and unfiltered for https://www.onlinedegree.com/transgender-first-scholarship